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Molly Senecal's avatar

I so relate to the "should haves" - I also lost my middle child. My heart feels for your heart. 💜

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Molly, I feel for you...💙

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Elizabeth Kopple's avatar

I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Sheila. These photos show the joy your family shared with her.

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Thank you for reading and restacking. She truly was at the center of our family. She bright light and love into our world and shared it unconditionally.

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Esther Stanway-Williams's avatar

Pacing ourselves in our grief is so important. I think I’ve got better at letting time guide me as to when to change things around in the house. I love that you have made Shelia’s room a Christmas one, in her honour. She would love it too 🥰

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Esther, I believe you are right. Christmas was so important to her, not in a selfish way. It was important because her family surrounded her and family was everything to her.

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Esther Stanway-Williams's avatar

I always smile when you describe Sheila’s delight in life. My uncle (my Dad’s younger brother) had Downs and I always remember how much fun he brought to family occasions and it brings it back to me. My abiding memory of his visits to us at Christmas was of his standing up and saluting when the national anthem played ahead of the queen’s speech 😊 He was so tender with my children when they were young too, I think he understood what it was to be vulnerable better than most people.

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

I would agree regarding an innate ability to understand vulnerability.

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Dani Ramos's avatar

Your Christmas room and all of your decorating are such a beautiful tribute to Sheila. You are keeping the joy she had in all things vibrant and close to you. It's a wonderful way to honor her.

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Thank you, Dani!

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Nancy A's avatar

The in-between... No words, just hugs. 💞

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

And the hugs are appreciated, Nancy A

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JL Tooker's avatar

So many treasures ... none of them buried.

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Nope, not buried! And thanks for restacking!

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Jean's avatar

We are approaching the date of Alex's death. Yes, it's on the calendar each year and we will toast him again this year. We lost him just 3 short years ago. This thing called grief, once it visits us, doesn't just disappear but it does change. We keep doing our best to roll with it. Some days are easier than others. Wonder if you've yet been able to pull out the book I sent you early on called, "The In-between"...Love you frister.

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Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Love you more…frister. I started it right after I received it and then it got buried in a stack of book recommendations. It wasn’t ready for it then. I just unburied it and it will be my next read!

You are so right about grief not disappearing once it comes calling. But then, I’ve known that since having Sheila. Chronic grief is something every parent of a child with a disability discovers is their new BFF.

Frankly, I prefer you as a BFF…frister! ❤️

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